Friday, May 01, 2009

what next?

So two days from now at this time, I hope to be done with my 10K race. The butterflies are seriously out of control, and they've been joined by what I'm affectionately calling the Fret Funk.

The Fret Funk is when the amount of worry becomes a tidal wave and just kind of squashes me down in to a funk. The weather is gray and humid, which isn't helping. And there is really nothing to worry about, but that's never stopped me before. I could fret for England. Actually I would make a differentiation between worrying and fretting. Fretting is the sort of worry where you focus on small details, blowing them all out of proportion and making them the focus to sort of distract you from what really might be going on in your head. That sort of thing.

Maybe if I set it all out here, it'll somehow purge me of it and I can move on to whether or not we're going to have a population die out due to this kind of thing:

Stole this from here, not sure what the original source is. Mothers, you're shuddering right now, aren't you?

So here's what I'm fretting at the moment: I have the teensiest bit of a cold. Mostly a sore throat, mostly been staving it off, but I fret that the fretting will allow itto take hold and pull me under into full-on ill. A runny nose during a run (ha! is a gross thing. The weather for Sunday isn't cooperating. The forecast is for somewhere between a chance of rain to an all day drizzle. Also, my er, Communist Friend has paid an unexpected return! visit, after just leaving last week. WTF? Generic birth control, you suck. It really does pay to buy name brand. So really, how much more fun can we have? I would name other things that could happen, but I just don't want to call them into being, frankly. I'll stick with the shit that's actually happening rather than anything else that might. I'm fretting about running amongst 447 (as of this morning) other people. Aieee! I've never so much as run with another person, really, except maybe being passed by someone else who is in high gear.

Also fretting about picking up my race packet. Because we have other committments, I can't pick it up until 5:00 or so on Saturday, which FREAKS me out because what if something happens and I'm running late and they close down early (they should be there handing packets out until 9:00 pm) or something. Do you see? It's a sickness. All this fretting is heavy, and it's bringing me down. I should be excited, and I am, in theory, but I just can't quiet my head.

Anyway, moving on. I promise some pictures and a full race re-cap next week. Also we've got to talk about what's next once the race is over.

One last thing--on the Diamond Earring Weight front I've got eightish pounds to go. I think I might be able to see that from here.

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