For the record, Ruby saw the vet week before last and hasn't gained an ounce in the last year. She's healthy, aside from what apparently is a small boulder of earwax in each ear. All of those reading this over a meal or snack, you're welcome.
I don't know if I should be offended, amused, or what. I mean, she's a dog. She's got three simple pleasures in life, but I'd say they rank, in order:
- Licking her privates. Obvious, no explanation needed.
- Her soccer ball. She loves to chase it, to nudge it under the couch. Sometimes she even climbs the stairs and drops it down them for herself.
- Mushrooms. As someone who has dieted extensively I can promise you that this is nearly a no-calorie food, and I swear it is her favorite reward treat. She'd rather have a mushroom stem than almost anything. Possibly even more than #1.
|I mean, how sad is this?|
Obviously I'm internalizing this a bit--but seriously? Don't tell anyone their dog is fat. It's like saying someone's wife or child is fat. Ok, maybe not exactly like that, but it's better said inside your head only.
Speaking of dogs, check this out. And this. Both will make you happy if you have animal love in your life. Wait, was that dirty? Eh. Enjoy.