She Could Spot a Two Week Old Sunburn at 50 Paces

Dermotologist appointment today, which I have discovered is a great way place to go if I need to be taken down a peg about how I've been taking care of my body. I have rosacea, so went in for a check up and to get a different topical creme to try and work on that, and I'm itching like crazy so I thought I'd mention that. The first thing the noticed was that my scalp was irritated. Honestly you can't really see that I burned at this point. Unless you're my dermotologist, apparently. So I had to fess up that I'd actually gotten a bit of a sunburn in San Diego (whoops) but that it wasn't too bad, hadn't figured I'd burn so easily at a lower elevation, etc.

--I should be wearing a hat. Every time I go outside I need to wear a hat. Even to go get the mail I need a hat. Apparently they are making hats with spf woven into them. And they're cute. We'll see about that.

I pointed out that I did buy a hat in San Diego and did wear it later in the trip.

--I should be using haircare products with sunscreen in them. Did you know there were haircare products with sunscreen in them? Why yes, there are.

I showed her a spot on my leg where I've been itching, and admittedly I was running late this morning so after shaving my legs I didn't have time to put lotion on them.

--I need to be moisturizing all over, everywhere, every single day. She obviously doesn't realize that I'm not a morning person and I'm lucky if I get out of bed in time to shower and brush my teeth. With my type of skin I really need to be doing that every single day.

We finally moved on to the fact that I can't stop itching, which she decided was probably allergies.

--I need to drink plenty of water and try to stay hydrated.

--I need to take Clairitin every day, and if it makes me drowsy, take it at night. I was also given samples of about 7 different kinds of lotions to try.

--And finally, I need to be using a retina-a product to basically peel off the top layer of skin to keep down inflammation, help reduce age spots and essentially make me a better person. Ok, better looking. Apparently. Oh, and by the way, this stuff costs $30 an ounce for the generic and over $100 an ounce for the sample I'm giving you. Oh, and it's considered to be cosmetic rather than medication so insurance doesn't cover it even though you need a prescription for it. And you might want to use it every 3 days to start because it might make you look like a komodo dragon in molt.

That's just great. Wonderful. Just what I need, more medication my insurance doesn't cover but costs over $100. Whee. I love sun damage.

So, in summary, I will be the one you see with a giant floppy hat and sunglasses covering the bulk of her flaky, peeling face, wearing long sleeves and pants in the summer, greasy with lotion, guzzling from a gallon jug of water and penniless from trying to afford all the crap I've slathered all over myself. Oh look, there I am, the girl who has had a sunburn in the last seven years. Just ask my dermotologist--she'll be able to pick me out.