Some days, it doesn't take much to set me off. Today might be one of those days. The mildest of cruelties can shatter me, to the point where I'm at my desk, at work, in tears. It can be a comment from Mr. Bump, which wasn't meant to hurt my feelings but I take it wrong. It can be the fact that I woke up from a horrible dream, where I had done things my waking mind despised.
It can be the cumulation of several days of baiting from a mouthy male coworker, trying to get me to argue with him about subjects I have no investment in. I hate that kind of lawyer, the one who likes the argument, will take up whatever side you are against. I don't like to argue. I'm no good at it. It makes me tearful and shaky and I doubt myself too much to ever be really good at debate.
It can be the fact that I'm waiting for a voicemail and every time I check there are no messages. It can be I hate my hair.
This last bout seems to have been triggered simply by the act of walking down the hall. I feel like I could splinter, if you touched me wrong. Don't take this the wrong way, I'll live. There are just days I can shrug off all the shit that swirls around you. Today I haven't a chance.
Maybe I'm just tired. Maybe I'm just hormonal. Maybe I'm dehydrated. I don't know. I'm just saying, you might want to be careful around me. I seem to be leaking.