where was i?

Lots has been going on, and also I've just been plugging away. Did I tell you that I've switched from running the 5K on May 3rd to running the 10K? I've been running 6 miles or so once a week, so I think I can do it. Mind you, when I say running, I mean running for a while, then walking to get my heart rate back down, then running again until it spikes, and so on. I've been given permission by my various books about running to walk when I have to, and that it doesn't mean that I'm not a runner. Running is going ok. Some days it is harder, some days I amaze myself. But it is never easy. On every single run I have more than one moment of "Why am I doing this again?" But I figure as long as I run again after walking, that I'm still moving forward. It is a challenge I enjoy, and I like pushing myself. I don't know how it is going to go in a race. Hopefully I won't freak out and run too fast out of the gate and crap out. I think I'm going to start out walking until the playing field clears a bit. I usually start out walking before I run anyway.

I've been running home from work once a week (ok, for the past 3 weeks), which I did last night. The distance is 4 miles door to door, and my time last night was 51:14. That works out to just under a 13 minute mile (4.68 miles per hour), which is pretty good! Especially since the elevation gain is 308 feet. My 6 mile split is a little slower (13.20 minutes per mile or 4.48 miles per hour), but I'm feeling pretty good about that and the 10K. I'm pretty sure I can do it in 1:20, unless something bad happens or I can't run freely because of all the people in my way. Currently there are 182 people registered for the 10K, but I'm sure that will rise as race time gets closer. Which is, incidentally 32(!) days away. If you're conscious at 7:00 am MDT on May 3rd, think of me going "The Distance" with the Cake song on my mp3 player for inspiration.

My normal workout schedule (if you care, although if you don't, you've probably moved on to your next feed on your feed reader) is bike on the trainer on Monday, run home Tuesday, rest Wednesday, run something Thursday (haven't really settled Wednesday/Thursday yet), bike Friday, long run Saturday/Sunday, then 3 mile run Sunday if I ran Saturday. If it looks like I'm going to run on Sunday instead of Saturday, then I'll switch things around and run Wednesday, bike Thursday, run Friday, rest Saturday. I'd like to add Yoga to that (hopefully Mondays) and maybe a swim some days, every other Friday, perhaps. Also bought the 30 Day Shred video, but since I hear it kicks serious ass, I think I'll wait until after the 10K to implement that. But my flappy upper arms and saggy belly need some strength training, so I definitely want to do that. I try to burn 500 calories per workout, but as I lose more weight, that gets harder. I'm no longer doing that on a 3 mile run (usually about 415 calories in 35 minutes for that), so I've either got to run longer or find something else to do that burns more calories. Kickboxing sounds good, and I heard about this Bollywood dance class that sounds fun.

On to other milestones. They're flying pretty fast and furious at the moment, which mostly means I need to find some new goals. Measured the waist circumference today and it is 35 inches! Also skidded in to the "overweight" rather than "obese" portion of the BMI chart for my height. And as of this morning, the scale tells me I'm 14.4 pounds from my 100 pounds lost weight. Which for those of you in the know, is the Diamond Earring Weight. The Diamond Earring Weight is the weight at which I feel that I deserve something fantastic, and since I've been asking for diamond earrings each year at Christmas and birthday for several years with no results, I will be buying then for myself to mark the occasion of my 100 weight loss. I plan on wearing them every day to remind myself of the achievement, and to motivate me to keep the weight off. Seems like a good incentive.

The other issue of note is the fact that I have a towering stack of pants to give to ARC, and I am now down to three, possibly four, pairs of pants that fit me. I've donated maybe 20 pairs of pants because they're all so big I can pull them off without unbuttoning or unzipping them. Everyone seems to think this is a fabulous problem to have, and while that is hard to argue with, these pants represent a significant amount of money, and I just feel crappy about it. The pants problem applies to workout pants too. The last thing you need is to flash your ladybug knickers to the world when your workout pants become so sodden with sweat that they make their way southward of their own volition. I'm also hesitant to buy more pants because I'm probably going to drop a size or two still, so I'm rotating the pants and doing laundry more often (this makes Mr. Bump very happy), both to keep on top of the pants situation and to keep in sportsbras, which really have a funk after one workout (TMI? sorry). I can't wait until some spring actually happens so I can wear a skirt or two.

Last little bit of crowing (I swear!): people at work have finally started to notice the weight loss. I had dinner with girlfriends I hadn't seen since January and they didn't recognize me as I headed toward them in the restaurant. All of this feels good. But at the same time I'm still not able to take the compliments. Will someone tell me why that is so hard? I say thank you, but I feel bashful. I want people to notice, I want people to say something, but when that happens I don't know how to deal with it. Any advice on this subject would be greatly appreciated.

So, there's the update. If anyone is still reading this, then I thank you. I have a lot of thoughts to put down here about weight loss, all the little things that change, or ways in which I'm struggling to adapt. It is a brave new world for me, I tell you.